What does Christmas smell like to you?

Today a customer came in and immediately said, "It smells like Christmas in here!" Everyone says it smells so good in the gift shop and for whatever reason I can't smell it. Maybe I'm just too used to it? I don't know. They must be smelling a combo of the candles and air fresheners for the car. I wonder what Christmas smells like to him.

I think most people's smell of Christmas is at least partly the "tree" smell... for me it doesn't include any tree type of scent because I'm allergic. And yes, that sucks. Christmas to me smells like cinnamon, cookies, apples and nutmeg.

Ya gotta respect the money... right?

It was hot today. I mean, for us, it was hot today. Our days are generally in the mid 60's so "hot" is relative for sure. Rumor has it the temps were up to 91 F in places. Needless to say I sold a lot of water and other beverages today. One sweet older lady came up and bought a 1.5 liter bottle of Aquafina. I told her that would be $1.65. She proceeded to put down one dollar and then sort through her coins. Somewhere along the lines she had been given a .10¢ Canadian coin. She didn't realize that's what it was and I let her know. The look on her face was of such disgust... not with me, mind you, but with the coin. It was hard for me not to laugh. She told me, "Throw it away! It's worthless!"

I didn't toss the coin. Ya gotta respect the money, right? Even if it isn't the currency of our country. I saved the offending coin.

Is personal grooming appropriate to do in public?

So I took a very unscientific poll on facebook. I asked the question:

"Am I alone in thinking it's really not acceptable for a person to cut their fingernails in a public waiting area?"

It was unanimous that it was indeed, uncouth to cut ones nails in public though cutting ones finger nails is public is preferable to cutting ones toenails in public.

Cutting your nails is necessary and I encourage you to keep them trimmed/well groomed and clean. For heaven's sake, keep 'em clean! However, this is one personal grooming task that really ought to be done in the privacy of your own home. Yes, we all do it. Some more than others. It's even one of those things that, dare I say, really isn't gross in and of itself but becomes nasty if done in public? I mean, when my family members do this at home I think nothing of it. So long as they are clipping over a trash bin. But in public? Really? Is this what we've come to as a society? Please. Let's not.

For the record I have seen, or rather, heard because I always hear it first - SNIP! CLIP! that horrid sounds that makes me want to scream "Stop it!" no less than 10 times in the last few years. And once, yes, once, the "person" was clipping their toe nails for heaven's sake. This is a public waiting area. People eat at these tables. People work at these tables. Keep your personal bits off the tables. Respect yourself. Respect others. Thank you.

What does "Out of Service" mean to you?

We posted an "Out of Service" sign on a stall door in the ladies restroom at work because someone (who shall remain nameless because like every other customer, they didn't fess up that they had broken something) managed to break off the flushing lever. I'm not kidding. We found the lever on the back of the toilet's tank with nastiness in the toilet bowl, of course. I suppose we should have been thankful the customer didn't try to flush the lever, that would have been a real mess.

Once we found out that the lever was broken we closed the stall door, put up the sign and left the broken off piece on the back of the toilet's tank to be fixed when time permitted.

Since that stall was obviously "out of order" we posted this sign on the stall door to ensure no one used that toilet. The sign makes it fairly clear that that toilet is out of order, yes? As in, don't freaking use this, right? Yeah, so apparently not.

You see, a brilliant customer used said toilet even with the huge sign taped on the door. It's not like there were no other options. This is not the only toilet stall in our ladies restroom. Said brilliant customer used the toilet and then had the gall to come out to the cashier to hand her the broken lever and state, "I couldn't flush because the lever was broken off."

No shit lady. We know you can't flush it and we know the lever was broken off. Thus there was a sign CLEARLY posted NOT TO USE THAT STALL.

What we learned from this is that "Out of Service" means different things to different people, apparently. Well, that and we absolutely have the most idiotic customers in the world. I try to never underestimate the stupidity of others but I gotta tell ya, at my job that's hard to do at times such as this.

The customer is not always right because often times the customer is an idiot

Ok, so while I work at a gift shop as the manager/buyer and sometimes cashier; said gift shop is attached/part of a hand car wash.

On the bottom of all of our receipts is the following:

*Return this vehicle & receipt & save*
$2.00 off the Executive regular price
$2.00 off the Works regular price
Offer expires after 10 days of receipts date

One day an older gentleman comes in and states he's here for his $2. Um. What?! We don't pay people to simply show up; even employee's have to actually work in order to get paid. This guy wasn't getting a car wash and he hadn't had his car washed with us for about two months.

First, the cashier got to explain to him that the receipt is simply a coupon for $2 off his next car wash if he comes back within 10 days with the same vehicle. He tells her that's crazy as no one would get their car washed every 10 days. She calmly told him that we do actually have many customers who come in once a week and many of them do take advantage of the discount coupon which is on each receipt. He wasn't buying it and refused to listen to her.

As the gift shop manager I was the closest manager to the situation so I went over to relieve the cashier and I attempted to explain it to him. He argues with me that his receipt says we'll give him $2 for showing up. (Okaaayyyyyyyy)

I then call the manager of the car wash to come in and talk to him. While the manager is talking to him, he's getting more irritated and angry that we won't give him the $2. Then in walks my Grandfather (the owner of the whole mess) and HE tried to calm this guy down and talk some sense into him... while that's going on my Grandmother (the other owner of the whole shebang) happens to come in and she gets involved, too.

Keep in mind it was a very busy day. Each one us had things we should have been doing not to mention the scene this was causing in front of all of our paying customers who were very much within hearing range of this raving lunatic.

Not one of us ever got through to the guy that no where on the receipt does it say "show up and we'll fork over $2 just because you're awesome". Not to mention, if it did, he wouldn't qualify, being that he was not awesome.

Eventually, after arguing for more than an hour with this guy, he finally left. He was royally pissed off and still believed we owed him two bucks for stopping by with his two month old receipt in hand. Thankfully, on his way out he was yelling how he would never return. Music to our ears.

Therefore the customer is not always right because the customer is often a freaking idiot.

My job seriously makes me feel exactly like this

I have told my co-worker more than once that, "The more people I meet, the more I like my cat." and sadly, it's quite true. If I don't get out of retail someday soon I may wind up hating all people everywhere. Worse yet, I may wind up a cat lady. Ack!

Want to see more of the "Losing faith in humanity one person at a time"? If so, click here.

If you can't control your children....

Look, I know the economy is in the toilet - no matter what anyone on TV says, things are still terrible for those of us in retail. Even so, if you can't control your children even somewhat, please just stay home. We really do not need your business that badly. Seriously.

Hey, I have a child, I know what it can be like. I'm not talking about a child who may be a little hyper, or a child who is having an off day. I'm also not talking about a child who may have special needs and may react differently to various stimuli. I'm talking about kids who do and say whatever the heck they want ~ at the ripe old age of 5. Kids who help themselves to our complimentary coffee (just what hyper children, need!). Kids who run all over their parent, touch everything (and 95% of what we sell is highly breakable), rearrange all the displays and just generally raise holy hell. While the children are doing all of this, "mom" is generally sitting in the waiting area, completely ignoring her children while she talks on her cell phone.

What. The. Hell.